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The Mullet Poems of 2004

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Oh, the mullet! Ode to the mullet! It is hard to express one's feelings for such an iconic look in only one poem, so welcome to the I Love Mullets poetry collection. Where mullet-lovers across the globe can join to express the respect, admiration, and in some cases, sheer worship of this hairstyle.

It doesn't matter what the mullet-owner is doing or wearing. Playing casino slots or riding a motorbike, lost in contemplation or cooking wearing cut-off jeans, a tank top, or a big wooly sweater with coke-bottle glasses--it doesn't matter. There is just something irresistibly attractive about them. Send in your poem of mullet-love today.

Mullet Poems...

"The Mullet Man I Long To Have"

He lives with his mom.

He lives in a trailer.

His stepmom came over.

I think that he nailed her.

His cutoffs scream ride me.

So thats what I'll do.

We'll do it in the pickup

until his peter's blue.

My fingers run through

his greasy red hair

that strokes the face

of the man from the fair.

-- Gladys Tranko and Penelope Cartwright


 

"Crazy Mullets"

Mullets are a work of art

you never no how they start

mullet ,mullet I love that mullet

that crazy mullet

I want to pullet

The next time u see a mullet

say to that man

sir you've got a crazy mullet!!!

-- Meagan Shaub and Whitney Hahn


"The Mullet"


Oh the mullet is a wonderful thing
I love the way it blows and swings
Buisness in the front so they say..
And everytime I see one, it makes my day.
Every place you go..
And every person you see
Has some mullet in their soul
Including me
So my advise to all of those
Who who dislike mullets ..to you this goes
Mullets are a beautiful thing
They leave a smile on the face
and you love the feeling of the curls
When your in the mullet beholder's embrace
So next time you see one,
Compliment the lucky star..
Because THE MULLET is a beautiful thing
whether you are near or you are far!
-- Erica L. Brodie


"The Glorious Mullet"

Mullets are the best haircut ever.
Would I think about cutting mine into one? Never.
Such an incredible style nothing can top.
Whenever I see one have to completely stop.
I stare in awe and a gaze of sorrow.
I say "Hey, is that a wig I can borrow?"
The Man just laughs at me, thinks his hair is great.
But under my breath I say, "He'll never get a date!
Not with that haircut at least, no way, no how!"
Why, I've seen better haircuts on a cow.
Mullets, however, for them I've always had a nack,
Because they're business in the front and party in the back!
-- AJ Sheehan


"Mullet Love"

mullets are apart of our life,

ever since the day we became husband and wife.

mullets are apart of our family tree,

and they will go down in history.

On my head, and the head of my son,

grow mullet grow, you lucky little one!

-- Andrea and Sheldon


"Pontiac Pontificated"

As I was walking down the street one day
I saw a very redneck looking man and thought hey,
He was driving in a trans am
and I thought "does a mullet make a man"
but now I see
it does now the one with the mullet is me




More Mullet Poetry!

"Mullets Everywhere"

Mullets, Mullets, everywhere
On the head of the man with such stylish flair.
He's the man in the crowd that is for all to see,
And bring smiles to not only my friends, but to me.

Mullets, Mullets, everywhere
Long live the essence of the free-growing hair.
All business in the front and all party in the back,
Guys with mullets always get the girl with the best rack.

Mullets, Mullets, for all to see
Why couldn't have god given a mullet to me?

-P-Mase
South Carolina

 

"Mullet Hunting

Mullet hunting is not a trend
Mullet huinting won't come to an end
Mullet hunting takes a skill
Mullet hunting can make you ill
Mullet hunting is a lot of fun
Mullet hunting makes you run
Mullet hunting can be tricky
Mullet hunting is sometimes sticky
Mullet hunting is quite a task
Mullet hunting requires going undercover with a mask


"Created in His Image"

The holiest of haircuts,

Most glorious of all,

Hiding my red-neck,

To my shoulders doth it fall.

Jesus loves the mullets,

For He knows they are his own.

He was made the King of Mullets,

When Davidís seed was sown.

And Jesus will return.

This world will pass away.

But a mullet is forever,

Until the judgment day.

-- Drew H., lover of Jesus, and lover of mullets.


Recent Hate Mail...

--- Vxxxx Sxxxxxx
--- xxxxxxxx@earthlink.net

LONG LIVE PUNK .... MULLETS SHOULD BE BURNED .... WHATS THE POINT.... MOW HAWKS AND LIBERTY POINTS FOR LIFE.

Love, Vinny S.

P.S VIVA LA ANARCHY


xxxxxxx@aol.com

I have some comments on these lines in the poems "I 'd live in a trailer." See now I think that that is making fun of the people who live in trailers. Now u tell me what's wrong with living in a trailer. Actually it would be nice to live in a trailer because it is smaller and less stuff to clean. So why make fun? I'm going to have to agree with Vinny "MULLETS SHOULD BE BURNED .... WHAT'S THE POINT.... MOW HAWKS AND LIBERTY POINTS FOR LIFE."

From a hater of mullets.

[Actually, there are many people who live in trailers that are not Trailer Trash. We, at www.ILoveMullets.com, agree that trailers can be wonderful places to grow up and raise a family.

In fact, one does not even need to live in a trailer to be Trailer Trash. This editor happens to have a neighbor who owns a huge house. But, the neighbor also happens to have pig roasts each summer as well as hub caps and license plates nailed to his house. He qualifies as Trailer Trash. Did I mention, he has a mullet?]

-The Editor



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